Hiding From “Arranged” Outcomes…December 3, 2008
I thought that my sister’s engagement party had gone well enough (no sexual harrassment, plenty of samosas had), but little did I know that I was being tracked, in a “meat market” kind of way.
In the latest pursuit, there was an eligible male at the party. I guess I caught his eye, so his sister told his aunt, who told a matchmaking granny, who told my mom’s friend, who told the newspaper boy (we got off track for a sec), who told a six-year-old, who told my mom.
Or something like that.
It was almost like a game of broken telephone, when you consider all the various filters. And by the time the “man tip” (huh?) finally reached my mom, she was setting me up with a goat-boy who lives up the hill and sells insurance. Or maybe it was a 30-year-old network engineer, who’s six feet tall and very well-mannered.
So I guess this means I should marry him (???). No of course not silly, Indians aren’t that crazy! I should only meet him over tea with the families present. Then we’ll be allowed to date for an hour. Seven to ten days later, a proposal will come via telephone.
(I’m already squealing with excitement…can you hear me from my cage?)
So when is the date for this loaded cup of tea?
Well, I’m not sure, because I’m currently unavailable. You see I’ll be “engaged” in some weekend volunteering (best excuse…ever). At the time I was only doing it to improve my image, but now it has a purpose!
Volunteering or not, I must avoid families and tea at all costs. Especially when my mind is so consumed with “the guy”.
Oh yes, “the guy”…where did I land on that again? Well I’m not sure, but something tells me it’s time for some Seduction-101 (…does anyone have a manual I can borrow?)